My name is Leinad. I am Daniel’s spleen. For the past several days, he has been suppressing his desire to maim and destroy his professors. Danes, his goody two-shoes honest-to-goodness conscience has interfered with my plans to take over Daniel’s body for the last time. In a matter of days, all my hatred will prevail. Soon this body will turn into a slaughter machine with an unquenchable thirst for violence and bloodshed. Revenge will be mine and their decomposing remains will be my trophy. Bwahahaha!!!
II
Greetings! This is Danes, conscience of Daniel. There had been rumors about an insurrection against our government. Leinad the Spleen plans on taking over the master’s body to wreak unspeakable torment. His eyes are set on the lab and philo professors of our master. If left unchecked, a fate most terrible will befall on them. A lot torturing is guaranteed, possibly even mutilation. I implore the kind reader to please stop Daniel once things get out of hand. Please intercede before it’s too late.
III
Daniel here. Recently I have been feeling malicious urges to beat the living crap out of my professors. My lab instructor whose face I usually mistake for compost is such an arrogant smartass with an ego that towers over Mount Everest. That slimy monstrosity deserves nothing but pain and suffering. A walking mound of horse manure such as herself should be flayed alive then boiled to a fine crisp till all her organs dissolve. It certainly would take care of her massive ego and butt ugly facial features. Even Shrek’s pimpled hairy asshole looks a lot better than her face. Decapitating and dismembering her would rid the world of her wretched existence. Heck, I’ll be doing the universe a great favor!
Next in line is my philo professor. He who thwarted my plans of having a good time must pay dearly with his life! I’ll put a hex on him for bad luck. Then I’ll run him over with a bulldozer. After which, I’ll drag his carcass at the top of a building where I’ll push him to fall on the solid concrete below. If I’m in the mood, maybe I’ll bathe him with toxic ooze and acid. And finally, I’ll lay him to sleep on a bed beautifully adorned with spikes, nails, broken glass, and burning coal.
Oh God! What’s happening to me?
Leinad the Spleen: Success!
Danes: Noooooooo!!!!!!!!
